Trap 6
by Angus Shoor Caan
Genre: Humour
Swearwords: None.
Description: Rur's nae gerrin' awa' fae some folk.
_____________________________________________________________________
“Whits 'es name?”
“Trap 6.”
“ 'Sa funny name furra dug.”
“ 'Shure dug's name?”
“Pete.”
“Wull rat's no' a funny name furra dug.”
“A ken.”
“ 'Sa doonright stupit name furra pare dug.”
“Whit made ye cry 'um Trap 6 ren?”
“ 'E wis wearin' a stripey coat whin a fun 'um. Black 'n' white stripes.”
“Ye fun 'um?”
“Doon ri shore front, aye.”
“Whit, ye jeest fun 'um doon rerr?”
“A wis oot walkin' m'urr dug an' 'e cum runnin' ower tae play.”
“Wis 'e jeest oot wi' esel' ren?”
“Faur is a could tell aye. An' naeb'dy waantit tae lay claim tae 'um s'a taen 'um roon' tae ri polis shope.”
“Whit did rey huv tae say.”
“Nuhin'. Rey wis getting' ready tae toass a junkie's hoose an' says rey wis aw busy.”
“Sae ye taen 'um hame is rarrit?”
“No really. A tried tae lea' 'um wi' a wee polis wummin' bir 'e folayed is hame.”
“An' Trap 6. Wis rat ri name oan 'es name tag ren?”
“Nae name tag, nae coalur, nae ID ataw. 'Hink sumb'dy jeest papped 'um oot a motor an' shote ri craw.”
“Aye bit, Trap 6?”
“Ri Trap 6 et ri dug racin' wears a black 'n' white stripey jaiket.”
“Disnae luk lit nae racin' dug tae me.”
“Yu'r awfy observant.”
“A'm mair e' a kickba' man masel'.”
“Right y'are.”
* * *
“Sa whit's wrang wi' 'um?”
“Nuhin'.”
“ R'urr's nuhin' wrang wi' 'um?”
“ 'Sright.”
“Sae whirry ye dein' sittin' here in ri Vet's waitin' room?”
“M'urr dug's no weel. 'Es in rerr wi' ma burd an' ri Vet ri noo.”
* * *
“D'ye waant tae ken whye a cawed ma dug Pete?”
“Naw.”
Swearwords: None.
Description: Rur's nae gerrin' awa' fae some folk.
_____________________________________________________________________
“Whits 'es name?”
“Trap 6.”
“ 'Sa funny name furra dug.”
“ 'Shure dug's name?”
“Pete.”
“Wull rat's no' a funny name furra dug.”
“A ken.”
“ 'Sa doonright stupit name furra pare dug.”
“Whit made ye cry 'um Trap 6 ren?”
“ 'E wis wearin' a stripey coat whin a fun 'um. Black 'n' white stripes.”
“Ye fun 'um?”
“Doon ri shore front, aye.”
“Whit, ye jeest fun 'um doon rerr?”
“A wis oot walkin' m'urr dug an' 'e cum runnin' ower tae play.”
“Wis 'e jeest oot wi' esel' ren?”
“Faur is a could tell aye. An' naeb'dy waantit tae lay claim tae 'um s'a taen 'um roon' tae ri polis shope.”
“Whit did rey huv tae say.”
“Nuhin'. Rey wis getting' ready tae toass a junkie's hoose an' says rey wis aw busy.”
“Sae ye taen 'um hame is rarrit?”
“No really. A tried tae lea' 'um wi' a wee polis wummin' bir 'e folayed is hame.”
“An' Trap 6. Wis rat ri name oan 'es name tag ren?”
“Nae name tag, nae coalur, nae ID ataw. 'Hink sumb'dy jeest papped 'um oot a motor an' shote ri craw.”
“Aye bit, Trap 6?”
“Ri Trap 6 et ri dug racin' wears a black 'n' white stripey jaiket.”
“Disnae luk lit nae racin' dug tae me.”
“Yu'r awfy observant.”
“A'm mair e' a kickba' man masel'.”
“Right y'are.”
* * *
“Sa whit's wrang wi' 'um?”
“Nuhin'.”
“ R'urr's nuhin' wrang wi' 'um?”
“ 'Sright.”
“Sae whirry ye dein' sittin' here in ri Vet's waitin' room?”
“M'urr dug's no weel. 'Es in rerr wi' ma burd an' ri Vet ri noo.”
* * *
“D'ye waant tae ken whye a cawed ma dug Pete?”
“Naw.”
About the Author
Angus Shoor Caan is in an ex-seaman and rail worker. Born and bred in Saltcoats, he returned to Scotland after many years in England and found the time to begin writing. He has a number of publications to his name, including Coont Thum and Tattie Zkowen's Perfect Days, both of which have been published by McStorytellers.