Invisible Man
by Alasdair McPherson
Genre: Drama
Swearwords: None.
Description: At twenty-two, James thinks he knows it all, but then he starts working beside fortysomethings.
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People can see me quite clearly but they seem to look through me. I have a nice little desk in the office that protects the Head Teacher from his staff and pupils but when someone comes in they go straight to the other desk where Barbara sits. She only leaves her desk between the hours of eight-thirty and five for two reasons: she goes to the loo or the Head calls her into his office.
“Is Barbara not here?”
“No.”
“Well I’ll wait.” “When will she be back?” “I’ll come back later.”
I’ve been here for three months now and I know where everything is kept but not one member of staff would dream of asking me. The office we share is at the end of a corridor and next to us is a larger office for the school Administrator and two ladies helping him. He is a relic from the days when paper records were kept and he knows next to nothing about computer systems.
Most of the stuff he does is confidential and I’m not supposed to have access but he makes so many mistakes that Barbara has given me the passwords so I can correct his goofs. He has never mentioned that corrections are constantly being made. Perhaps he thinks it’s his good fairy – I’m invisible so it can’t be me!
I’m really supposed to be a girl but Barbara had the job of finding a Junior delegated to her and she picked me. One of the other applicants had better marks than me at college where we studied Business Administration so I was surprised to be picked. I keep my eyes open and I’m pretty sure now that she lost out because of her long blonde hair and cleavage that goes down to just above her navel.
Beyond the Administrator’s office is the reception desk manned by a female dragon who carefully selects who can pass to reach Barbara or the Administrator. I actually get on really well with Ruth; she has a picture of cats on her reception counter so every morning I ask after her pets. I’m more of a dog person but we have friendly arguments about which makes the best pet. Ruth brings me a doughnut on Fridays.
I’m James, by the way, and I’m twenty-two. I’ve moved in with my Mum since I started this job after sixteen years with my father and stepmother. I was only six when my parents split; Dad had a good job, Mum was unemployed, homeless and she was the one who walked away from the marriage so he got custody.
He re-married the young girl he had been dating when my Mum found out and left him; I was an appendage to the love nest. I was well fed, well-educated and invisible to Dad and his bride. He made me go to University but I hated it and dropped out after a year. His reaction was a surprised shrug so I got myself a place at the local college and got a vocational qualification. Mum had always taken me out on Sundays under the terms of the divorce settlement. Before she married Dad she had been a nurse and she is now the live-in matron in an old peoples’ complex just a five minute bike ride from the school.
My Dad never did take much notice of me – invisible, you see – but mum paid attention. I think the reason I get on so well with Barbara and Ruth is that they are like Mum. She’s forty-five and I guess Barbara is about the same, although Ruth is, I think, a bit older. She’s a widow with grown-up children; the boy lives in Australia and the girl in Dubai, or maybe it’s the other way round.
My Dad thinks I’m wasting my time here but I really enjoy this job. It certainly was an eye-opener to see how much is involved in running a school. I had an idea that teachers and pupils just turned up and got on with things but what with timetabling and finding out which pupils need extra help it’s very complicated. There’s plenty of variety; I remember when I was at school every day seemed the same except the day when you got your favourite teacher or subject.
Today, for example, I had to go to the Hall as soon as morning assembly was over and bring four chairs into our office. There they are now occupied by four Science teachers waiting to be interviewed for a vacancy. The Head is in his office with the Chairperson of the Governors and the Head of Science and any minute now the intercom on Barbara’s desk will buzz and the first candidate will go in to face the ordeal.
At least, it would be an ordeal for me but only one of the candidates seems really nervous. She is a mother of three children and is returning to work after eleven years – that’s half my lifetime. Barbara thinks she would be better doing supply teaching at first to get back into the groove. One of the men is about my age and he has been working here as part of his Post Graduate Certificate. His name is Pete and he thinks he’s wonderful. I don’t.
There is a pretty girl who is scheduled to go in last. Before the candidates arrived this morning Barbara had already backed her to get the job.
“Young and female makes her ninety per cent certain. Only a very bad case of halitosis will keep her out!”
The fourth candidate is a man about my Dad’s age who is sitting very calmly. His name is David Spark and he gave me a wink as he sat down. There is something familiar about him but I can’t think where I have seen him before. The buzzer sounds and the mother of three blushes a deep red and steps out of the frying pan. No sooner has the door shut behind her than Penny Devine skips through the door. She teaches English and is by far the best looking teacher in the whole school – like drop dead gorgeous!
The dragon is supposed to keep everyone away while the interviews are taking place but Penny has a way of wheedling herself around obstacles. She takes no notice of me, the invisible man, and only glances at Mr Spark and Barbara before going over to Pete who stood as soon as she came into the room.
“Jeez, Penny, there’s a time and a place, you know,” Pete told her.
“I only wanted to wish you luck, darling.”
“Ok so you’ve wished me luck, now piss off. It’s not as if I need luck, anyway.”
Mr Spark raised his eyebrows at me and all I could do was shrug in response. I really wanted to go up to Pete and tell him that he was lucky to have Penny on his side but he would just have ignored me. Penny tried to give him a hug but he pushed her away so hard that she stumbled and might have fallen if Mr Spark had not risen and steadied her.
“That’s enough,” he said to Pete in a quiet voice, still holding Penny’s arm.
“What’s it to you, old man,” Pete sneered taking a step closer to Mr Spark who stood his ground and quietly looked Pete in the eye.
“This isn’t the time or the place but I’ll settle with you, old man, if you interfere again.” Even to me it sounded like bluster.
The door to the interview room opened and the first candidate came out looking flustered.
“Penny, would you mind taking Mrs Green to the staffroom and getting her a cup of tea?” Barbara asked, getting up and steering the candidate over to Penny standing just beside my desk looking a bit bemused at recent events. I was more than a bit confused myself.
Then the buzzer sounded and Mr Spark went in to face the inquisition. Pete sat down and started chatting to the pretty girl candidate while Penny went out with Mrs Green. When he came out, Mr Spark thanked Barbara and me then he wished the remaining two candidates good luck. He was almost at the door when the Head of Science came out of the interview room and asked him if he would mind waiting for a few minutes until the other interviews were completed.
Pete was next in and he reappeared smirking and giving the girl and Mr Spark a rather pitying smile before swaggering out the door. When the pretty girl went in it left Barbara, Mr Spark and me, so I settled down to do some work, leaving them to chat quietly.
One of the things I hadn’t realised about schools was that books and equipment wear out. Between Christmas and Easter Heads of subjects have to submit bids for funding for the next session. It was my job to file these requisitions but I read through some. It struck me that the prices that had been quoted were over the top so I checked on alternative suppliers.
I thought Barbara would chew me out but instead she asked me to get alternative quotes. That was easy enough in the subjects I’m interested in like English and History but I was lost when it came to judging the quality of pipettes since I hadn’t a clue what they were! I’m now preparing alternative suppliers and Barbara will ask the Heads of subject to look at them to see if they’ll do.
Once I had sent a quote to the printer, I began to pay attention to what was going on round about me.
“Why do you want to come here, David?” Barbara was asking.
“Do you know, Barbara, I suspect that you’ve read my application and know all about me,” he replied teasingly.
She blushed and laughed: “I tried that but it doesn’t say why you want this job.”
What was going on? Just then the door opened and the Head ushered out the young lady candidate managing to squeeze up against her as they both went through the door at the same time. Once they had parted by an inch or two and giggled, she offered her hand which the Head took and brought to his lips.
When he eventually let go she thanked Barbara, sketched a faint smile in my direction and left. The Head of Science had followed them out the interview room and he sat down beside Mr Spark while the Head returned with a silly grin on his face. His heavy pass at the candidate triggered the notion that Barbara, in her own refined way, had been flirting with David Spark.
I don’t know about you, but the idea that middle aged people might want to flirt had not really crossed my mind before. The Head was just an old pervert, of course, leering at any moderately pretty girl he saw. I’m sure it’s the main reason he never goes near the pupils except at assembly; it’s certainly the reason Barbara wanted a man for the job as Junior.
While I’d been adjusting my perception of life, the Head of Science had offered Mr Spark a job until the end of the school session. The post had become vacant when the previous teacher was diagnosed with cancer and had to leave at once to get treatment. The other applicants could not start until after the summer holidays so they were relying on supply teachers.
“I’m so glad you decided to take the job, David,” Barbara said when the Head of Science had re-joined the Head and Chair of Governors. “We must try to get you interested in our little community. Do you like music?”
I switched off again, leaving them to their gentle flirtation. I found myself looking at Barbara with fresh eyes. She’s not old exactly but she is so calm that it hadn’t even crossed my mind that she might be subject to the longing for love that afflicted me and other people my age. She always dresses smartly and her hair and make-up are understated but attractive. If I was Mr Spark’s age I could well imagine fancying her.
She had always seemed like my mother until now. That’s when I got a really scary thought. Would my Mum want to flirt with Mr Spark if she got the chance? It’s hard to think of your Mum as a woman but I tried to picture her in her office talking to a man her own age. The problem is that I see her without any frills, hidden under cold cream or slobbing out in front of the television in her shapeless old dressing gown.
“James!”
I came back to the present to find Barbara and her David smiling at me.
“You were miles away,” Barbara grinned. “I asked you to take the chairs back to the Hall.”
Mr Spark gave me a hand with them on his way out.
“I’ll see you on Monday, Barbara, although I’ll probably meet young James before then.” He clapped me on the shoulder as he said this. Unless he watched public park football or went clubbing with the twenty-somethings, I didn’t see how we were likely to meet. A couple of years ago I thought I was pretty clued up but working with adults is revealing huge gaps in my understanding of life.
I cycled home still wondering about middle aged people having a love life. Even my Mum might have inclinations that way although I could not bring myself to picture anything more sexual than a fairly chaste kiss. I had dinner ready for Mum when she came up to our flat on the top floor of the residential block. I suppose I must have been staring at her, trying to change her image from just Mum to someone that Mr Spark might want to snog.
She asked why I was staring, of course, and I could only think to say that she looked particularly nice.
“James, I’ve had a fraught day. It’s lovely to get a compliment even from your own son but it would be more tactful to wait until I deserve it!”
Fortunately it was a Thursday so I had to go off to pay my rent. When I moved in with her I offered Mum money but she asked me instead to spend two evenings a week with the old folk using the common room. There are forty-two residents in the main building but the common room is open to the people living in the bungalows scattered throughout the grounds.
At first I was reluctant to spend time with a bunch of fogeys marking time while they waited for death to claim them. It was only later that I came to understand that they were every bit as uneasy about me! Our facilities are not cheap, so most of the residents have been accustomed to ordering youngsters like me about. It took several weeks for us to appreciate each other.
I was helped a lot by Elsie and Ruth, two of the younger helpers. Ruth is in her late twenties, divorced with a six year old son and Elsie is nineteen. I rather like Elsie – in fact, I really fancy her – but Ruth told me I’d be wasting my time as she had a boyfriend. It’s true because I saw him pick her up in his car and she gave him a kiss on the cheek as she got in. Ah well!
I enjoy my Tuesday and Thursday evenings so much now that I’ve taken to dropping in on Sunday afternoons as well. I play soccer for a local team on Saturday afternoons and after the game we all head off to the pub and generally finish up in a night-club. I’m usually more or less recovered by Sunday afternoon.
The main meal on Sunday is lunch so that the cordon bleu chefs can have the afternoon to themselves. I eat with the residents and I’ll bet people don’t eat better in Michelin restaurants. Some of our residents have difficulty remembering what day it is but none of them has forgotten the taste of superb cuisine! Sunday afternoon is the time that relatives call to visit or to take their folk out for the day.
Some of the residents get few visits and a very few of them get none at all. Elsie and me spend the afternoon with them. They have all sorts of different illnesses – we have two trained nurses on duty 24/7 – but they are all lonely. I asked Elsie what her boyfriend thought about her spending Sundays doing unpaid overtime but she just shrugged and smiled. I wish she gave me some of the attention she gives the old people but, as usual, I’m invisible.
The morning after the interviews, the Head was at a meeting in the county town. After assembly, Keith Anderson, the Head of Science came in, carefully closing the door behind him.
“We’re stuck with that giggly girl, then,” he began.
“If she takes the job. What do you think, James?” Barbara took me by surprise. When we were alone she always asked my opinion but this was the first time she had turned to me with anyone else in the room. Mr Anderson looked at me but I couldn’t read his expression although he seemed to be more interested in what I’d say than I expected.
“I think she giggled because she was uneasy. I think she’d be more interested in Penny – Miss Devine – than the Head.”
Barbara was nodding her head but Mr Anderson looked surprised.
“I missed that,” he murmured. “The chair of governors phoned me last night. She and the deputy chair are coming in for a meeting in the next half hour. I want you there, Barbara. Now young James, give me your thoughts on the other candidates.”
So I told them that I agreed with Barbara about the mum who had been out of teaching for eleven years. I told them that I didn’t think Pete was cut out to be a teacher and that I had been impressed by Mr Spark. They both nodded.
“So what do you think about the Head?” Mr Anderson asked.
“He hardly knows the pupils and he makes some of the sixth form girls a bit uneasy the way he looks at them.”
The two governors arrived at that moment and took Mr Anderson and Barbara into the Head’s office where they remained until lunchtime when he came out and asked me to bring coffee and sandwiches for them. At half past four, Barbara came out to tell me that I could go home. I had spent the day doing routine filing since I couldn’t stop my mind speculating on the subject of their discussions.
When I got home my Mum was coming out of Mrs Docherty’s bungalow looking over her shoulder at Mr Spark! Mrs Docherty had just come out of hospital after suffering a stroke although Mum told me that the old lady was recovering well and would likely not be permanently paralysed. I was careful not to bother Mum when she was on duty but the sight of Mr Spark stopped me in my tracks.
“I told you we might meet before Monday,” he grinned at me. “Is this your son, Kate?” he asked my Mum. When did they get onto first name terms, I wondered?
“Yes this is my one and only. David is Martha Docherty’s son and he has come home to spend some time with her while she recovers from her stroke. He says you were very nice to him yesterday.”
I didn’t know what I had done that could be described as ‘very nice’ but I’m as ready as the next man to accept praise, however unwarranted.
* * *
That happened a year ago. The two days starting with the interviews seemed pretty ordinary at the time but they opened a sluice and the resulting flood caused some major changes. For a start, the Head resigned on grounds of ill health early in the summer term and Keith Anderson was appointed in his place. That news cheered everyone in the school but it had an especially good effect on Barbara.
She had told everyone that she was going on a cruise at Easter and bored us rigid by showing us the glossy brochures. I was sworn to secrecy that she would return as Mrs Anderson for the summer term. They had dated as youngsters but he had married on the rebound when they broke up. Now he was divorced and they had picked up the pieces of their past relationship.
The giggly girl – whose name I have since discovered is Theresa – joined us at the start of the new session under the new acting Head of Science, David Spark. The lady coming back after bringing up her own children reconsidered teaching and has become the Science technician in a school at the other end of town. Pete rejected a career in teaching and is now selling cars - but not to me!
The middle of June proved to be a good time for me. Mum’s place had a garden party where I assisted David on the barbeque pits; he worked for years in places where barbies are an everyday event and I watched in awe as he grilled and roasted to perfection. Elsie came to introduce her boyfriend only he turned out to be her brother and she was lodging with him and his wife. I can only make an unkind guess as to why Ruth told me different.
It turned out that I’m not invisible. David told me that I appear to be unapproachable and private so people don’t like to bother me. It seemed a bit far-fetched until the school Administrator came and had a long talk with me. He had known from the start that I was correcting his computer errors but he waited until he had watched my development as Barbara’s Junior. Now he planned to retire and he had strongly recommended that I get the job. The head backed him and the governors agreed.
On the strength of my promotion, Elsie and I have bought a flat to share. Mum is dating David pretty steadily so everyone is finding it easy to smile. The only problem I have is that, after Elsie and I have made love passionately and I’m just dropping off to sleep I have to supress the thought that my Mum might be getting up to something similar with David! I’ve learned a lot in the last year but I’m not ready to face that!
Swearwords: None.
Description: At twenty-two, James thinks he knows it all, but then he starts working beside fortysomethings.
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People can see me quite clearly but they seem to look through me. I have a nice little desk in the office that protects the Head Teacher from his staff and pupils but when someone comes in they go straight to the other desk where Barbara sits. She only leaves her desk between the hours of eight-thirty and five for two reasons: she goes to the loo or the Head calls her into his office.
“Is Barbara not here?”
“No.”
“Well I’ll wait.” “When will she be back?” “I’ll come back later.”
I’ve been here for three months now and I know where everything is kept but not one member of staff would dream of asking me. The office we share is at the end of a corridor and next to us is a larger office for the school Administrator and two ladies helping him. He is a relic from the days when paper records were kept and he knows next to nothing about computer systems.
Most of the stuff he does is confidential and I’m not supposed to have access but he makes so many mistakes that Barbara has given me the passwords so I can correct his goofs. He has never mentioned that corrections are constantly being made. Perhaps he thinks it’s his good fairy – I’m invisible so it can’t be me!
I’m really supposed to be a girl but Barbara had the job of finding a Junior delegated to her and she picked me. One of the other applicants had better marks than me at college where we studied Business Administration so I was surprised to be picked. I keep my eyes open and I’m pretty sure now that she lost out because of her long blonde hair and cleavage that goes down to just above her navel.
Beyond the Administrator’s office is the reception desk manned by a female dragon who carefully selects who can pass to reach Barbara or the Administrator. I actually get on really well with Ruth; she has a picture of cats on her reception counter so every morning I ask after her pets. I’m more of a dog person but we have friendly arguments about which makes the best pet. Ruth brings me a doughnut on Fridays.
I’m James, by the way, and I’m twenty-two. I’ve moved in with my Mum since I started this job after sixteen years with my father and stepmother. I was only six when my parents split; Dad had a good job, Mum was unemployed, homeless and she was the one who walked away from the marriage so he got custody.
He re-married the young girl he had been dating when my Mum found out and left him; I was an appendage to the love nest. I was well fed, well-educated and invisible to Dad and his bride. He made me go to University but I hated it and dropped out after a year. His reaction was a surprised shrug so I got myself a place at the local college and got a vocational qualification. Mum had always taken me out on Sundays under the terms of the divorce settlement. Before she married Dad she had been a nurse and she is now the live-in matron in an old peoples’ complex just a five minute bike ride from the school.
My Dad never did take much notice of me – invisible, you see – but mum paid attention. I think the reason I get on so well with Barbara and Ruth is that they are like Mum. She’s forty-five and I guess Barbara is about the same, although Ruth is, I think, a bit older. She’s a widow with grown-up children; the boy lives in Australia and the girl in Dubai, or maybe it’s the other way round.
My Dad thinks I’m wasting my time here but I really enjoy this job. It certainly was an eye-opener to see how much is involved in running a school. I had an idea that teachers and pupils just turned up and got on with things but what with timetabling and finding out which pupils need extra help it’s very complicated. There’s plenty of variety; I remember when I was at school every day seemed the same except the day when you got your favourite teacher or subject.
Today, for example, I had to go to the Hall as soon as morning assembly was over and bring four chairs into our office. There they are now occupied by four Science teachers waiting to be interviewed for a vacancy. The Head is in his office with the Chairperson of the Governors and the Head of Science and any minute now the intercom on Barbara’s desk will buzz and the first candidate will go in to face the ordeal.
At least, it would be an ordeal for me but only one of the candidates seems really nervous. She is a mother of three children and is returning to work after eleven years – that’s half my lifetime. Barbara thinks she would be better doing supply teaching at first to get back into the groove. One of the men is about my age and he has been working here as part of his Post Graduate Certificate. His name is Pete and he thinks he’s wonderful. I don’t.
There is a pretty girl who is scheduled to go in last. Before the candidates arrived this morning Barbara had already backed her to get the job.
“Young and female makes her ninety per cent certain. Only a very bad case of halitosis will keep her out!”
The fourth candidate is a man about my Dad’s age who is sitting very calmly. His name is David Spark and he gave me a wink as he sat down. There is something familiar about him but I can’t think where I have seen him before. The buzzer sounds and the mother of three blushes a deep red and steps out of the frying pan. No sooner has the door shut behind her than Penny Devine skips through the door. She teaches English and is by far the best looking teacher in the whole school – like drop dead gorgeous!
The dragon is supposed to keep everyone away while the interviews are taking place but Penny has a way of wheedling herself around obstacles. She takes no notice of me, the invisible man, and only glances at Mr Spark and Barbara before going over to Pete who stood as soon as she came into the room.
“Jeez, Penny, there’s a time and a place, you know,” Pete told her.
“I only wanted to wish you luck, darling.”
“Ok so you’ve wished me luck, now piss off. It’s not as if I need luck, anyway.”
Mr Spark raised his eyebrows at me and all I could do was shrug in response. I really wanted to go up to Pete and tell him that he was lucky to have Penny on his side but he would just have ignored me. Penny tried to give him a hug but he pushed her away so hard that she stumbled and might have fallen if Mr Spark had not risen and steadied her.
“That’s enough,” he said to Pete in a quiet voice, still holding Penny’s arm.
“What’s it to you, old man,” Pete sneered taking a step closer to Mr Spark who stood his ground and quietly looked Pete in the eye.
“This isn’t the time or the place but I’ll settle with you, old man, if you interfere again.” Even to me it sounded like bluster.
The door to the interview room opened and the first candidate came out looking flustered.
“Penny, would you mind taking Mrs Green to the staffroom and getting her a cup of tea?” Barbara asked, getting up and steering the candidate over to Penny standing just beside my desk looking a bit bemused at recent events. I was more than a bit confused myself.
Then the buzzer sounded and Mr Spark went in to face the inquisition. Pete sat down and started chatting to the pretty girl candidate while Penny went out with Mrs Green. When he came out, Mr Spark thanked Barbara and me then he wished the remaining two candidates good luck. He was almost at the door when the Head of Science came out of the interview room and asked him if he would mind waiting for a few minutes until the other interviews were completed.
Pete was next in and he reappeared smirking and giving the girl and Mr Spark a rather pitying smile before swaggering out the door. When the pretty girl went in it left Barbara, Mr Spark and me, so I settled down to do some work, leaving them to chat quietly.
One of the things I hadn’t realised about schools was that books and equipment wear out. Between Christmas and Easter Heads of subjects have to submit bids for funding for the next session. It was my job to file these requisitions but I read through some. It struck me that the prices that had been quoted were over the top so I checked on alternative suppliers.
I thought Barbara would chew me out but instead she asked me to get alternative quotes. That was easy enough in the subjects I’m interested in like English and History but I was lost when it came to judging the quality of pipettes since I hadn’t a clue what they were! I’m now preparing alternative suppliers and Barbara will ask the Heads of subject to look at them to see if they’ll do.
Once I had sent a quote to the printer, I began to pay attention to what was going on round about me.
“Why do you want to come here, David?” Barbara was asking.
“Do you know, Barbara, I suspect that you’ve read my application and know all about me,” he replied teasingly.
She blushed and laughed: “I tried that but it doesn’t say why you want this job.”
What was going on? Just then the door opened and the Head ushered out the young lady candidate managing to squeeze up against her as they both went through the door at the same time. Once they had parted by an inch or two and giggled, she offered her hand which the Head took and brought to his lips.
When he eventually let go she thanked Barbara, sketched a faint smile in my direction and left. The Head of Science had followed them out the interview room and he sat down beside Mr Spark while the Head returned with a silly grin on his face. His heavy pass at the candidate triggered the notion that Barbara, in her own refined way, had been flirting with David Spark.
I don’t know about you, but the idea that middle aged people might want to flirt had not really crossed my mind before. The Head was just an old pervert, of course, leering at any moderately pretty girl he saw. I’m sure it’s the main reason he never goes near the pupils except at assembly; it’s certainly the reason Barbara wanted a man for the job as Junior.
While I’d been adjusting my perception of life, the Head of Science had offered Mr Spark a job until the end of the school session. The post had become vacant when the previous teacher was diagnosed with cancer and had to leave at once to get treatment. The other applicants could not start until after the summer holidays so they were relying on supply teachers.
“I’m so glad you decided to take the job, David,” Barbara said when the Head of Science had re-joined the Head and Chair of Governors. “We must try to get you interested in our little community. Do you like music?”
I switched off again, leaving them to their gentle flirtation. I found myself looking at Barbara with fresh eyes. She’s not old exactly but she is so calm that it hadn’t even crossed my mind that she might be subject to the longing for love that afflicted me and other people my age. She always dresses smartly and her hair and make-up are understated but attractive. If I was Mr Spark’s age I could well imagine fancying her.
She had always seemed like my mother until now. That’s when I got a really scary thought. Would my Mum want to flirt with Mr Spark if she got the chance? It’s hard to think of your Mum as a woman but I tried to picture her in her office talking to a man her own age. The problem is that I see her without any frills, hidden under cold cream or slobbing out in front of the television in her shapeless old dressing gown.
“James!”
I came back to the present to find Barbara and her David smiling at me.
“You were miles away,” Barbara grinned. “I asked you to take the chairs back to the Hall.”
Mr Spark gave me a hand with them on his way out.
“I’ll see you on Monday, Barbara, although I’ll probably meet young James before then.” He clapped me on the shoulder as he said this. Unless he watched public park football or went clubbing with the twenty-somethings, I didn’t see how we were likely to meet. A couple of years ago I thought I was pretty clued up but working with adults is revealing huge gaps in my understanding of life.
I cycled home still wondering about middle aged people having a love life. Even my Mum might have inclinations that way although I could not bring myself to picture anything more sexual than a fairly chaste kiss. I had dinner ready for Mum when she came up to our flat on the top floor of the residential block. I suppose I must have been staring at her, trying to change her image from just Mum to someone that Mr Spark might want to snog.
She asked why I was staring, of course, and I could only think to say that she looked particularly nice.
“James, I’ve had a fraught day. It’s lovely to get a compliment even from your own son but it would be more tactful to wait until I deserve it!”
Fortunately it was a Thursday so I had to go off to pay my rent. When I moved in with her I offered Mum money but she asked me instead to spend two evenings a week with the old folk using the common room. There are forty-two residents in the main building but the common room is open to the people living in the bungalows scattered throughout the grounds.
At first I was reluctant to spend time with a bunch of fogeys marking time while they waited for death to claim them. It was only later that I came to understand that they were every bit as uneasy about me! Our facilities are not cheap, so most of the residents have been accustomed to ordering youngsters like me about. It took several weeks for us to appreciate each other.
I was helped a lot by Elsie and Ruth, two of the younger helpers. Ruth is in her late twenties, divorced with a six year old son and Elsie is nineteen. I rather like Elsie – in fact, I really fancy her – but Ruth told me I’d be wasting my time as she had a boyfriend. It’s true because I saw him pick her up in his car and she gave him a kiss on the cheek as she got in. Ah well!
I enjoy my Tuesday and Thursday evenings so much now that I’ve taken to dropping in on Sunday afternoons as well. I play soccer for a local team on Saturday afternoons and after the game we all head off to the pub and generally finish up in a night-club. I’m usually more or less recovered by Sunday afternoon.
The main meal on Sunday is lunch so that the cordon bleu chefs can have the afternoon to themselves. I eat with the residents and I’ll bet people don’t eat better in Michelin restaurants. Some of our residents have difficulty remembering what day it is but none of them has forgotten the taste of superb cuisine! Sunday afternoon is the time that relatives call to visit or to take their folk out for the day.
Some of the residents get few visits and a very few of them get none at all. Elsie and me spend the afternoon with them. They have all sorts of different illnesses – we have two trained nurses on duty 24/7 – but they are all lonely. I asked Elsie what her boyfriend thought about her spending Sundays doing unpaid overtime but she just shrugged and smiled. I wish she gave me some of the attention she gives the old people but, as usual, I’m invisible.
The morning after the interviews, the Head was at a meeting in the county town. After assembly, Keith Anderson, the Head of Science came in, carefully closing the door behind him.
“We’re stuck with that giggly girl, then,” he began.
“If she takes the job. What do you think, James?” Barbara took me by surprise. When we were alone she always asked my opinion but this was the first time she had turned to me with anyone else in the room. Mr Anderson looked at me but I couldn’t read his expression although he seemed to be more interested in what I’d say than I expected.
“I think she giggled because she was uneasy. I think she’d be more interested in Penny – Miss Devine – than the Head.”
Barbara was nodding her head but Mr Anderson looked surprised.
“I missed that,” he murmured. “The chair of governors phoned me last night. She and the deputy chair are coming in for a meeting in the next half hour. I want you there, Barbara. Now young James, give me your thoughts on the other candidates.”
So I told them that I agreed with Barbara about the mum who had been out of teaching for eleven years. I told them that I didn’t think Pete was cut out to be a teacher and that I had been impressed by Mr Spark. They both nodded.
“So what do you think about the Head?” Mr Anderson asked.
“He hardly knows the pupils and he makes some of the sixth form girls a bit uneasy the way he looks at them.”
The two governors arrived at that moment and took Mr Anderson and Barbara into the Head’s office where they remained until lunchtime when he came out and asked me to bring coffee and sandwiches for them. At half past four, Barbara came out to tell me that I could go home. I had spent the day doing routine filing since I couldn’t stop my mind speculating on the subject of their discussions.
When I got home my Mum was coming out of Mrs Docherty’s bungalow looking over her shoulder at Mr Spark! Mrs Docherty had just come out of hospital after suffering a stroke although Mum told me that the old lady was recovering well and would likely not be permanently paralysed. I was careful not to bother Mum when she was on duty but the sight of Mr Spark stopped me in my tracks.
“I told you we might meet before Monday,” he grinned at me. “Is this your son, Kate?” he asked my Mum. When did they get onto first name terms, I wondered?
“Yes this is my one and only. David is Martha Docherty’s son and he has come home to spend some time with her while she recovers from her stroke. He says you were very nice to him yesterday.”
I didn’t know what I had done that could be described as ‘very nice’ but I’m as ready as the next man to accept praise, however unwarranted.
* * *
That happened a year ago. The two days starting with the interviews seemed pretty ordinary at the time but they opened a sluice and the resulting flood caused some major changes. For a start, the Head resigned on grounds of ill health early in the summer term and Keith Anderson was appointed in his place. That news cheered everyone in the school but it had an especially good effect on Barbara.
She had told everyone that she was going on a cruise at Easter and bored us rigid by showing us the glossy brochures. I was sworn to secrecy that she would return as Mrs Anderson for the summer term. They had dated as youngsters but he had married on the rebound when they broke up. Now he was divorced and they had picked up the pieces of their past relationship.
The giggly girl – whose name I have since discovered is Theresa – joined us at the start of the new session under the new acting Head of Science, David Spark. The lady coming back after bringing up her own children reconsidered teaching and has become the Science technician in a school at the other end of town. Pete rejected a career in teaching and is now selling cars - but not to me!
The middle of June proved to be a good time for me. Mum’s place had a garden party where I assisted David on the barbeque pits; he worked for years in places where barbies are an everyday event and I watched in awe as he grilled and roasted to perfection. Elsie came to introduce her boyfriend only he turned out to be her brother and she was lodging with him and his wife. I can only make an unkind guess as to why Ruth told me different.
It turned out that I’m not invisible. David told me that I appear to be unapproachable and private so people don’t like to bother me. It seemed a bit far-fetched until the school Administrator came and had a long talk with me. He had known from the start that I was correcting his computer errors but he waited until he had watched my development as Barbara’s Junior. Now he planned to retire and he had strongly recommended that I get the job. The head backed him and the governors agreed.
On the strength of my promotion, Elsie and I have bought a flat to share. Mum is dating David pretty steadily so everyone is finding it easy to smile. The only problem I have is that, after Elsie and I have made love passionately and I’m just dropping off to sleep I have to supress the thought that my Mum might be getting up to something similar with David! I’ve learned a lot in the last year but I’m not ready to face that!
About the Author
Originally from Dalmuir, Alasdair McPherson is now retired and living in exile in Lincolnshire.
He says he has always wanted to write, but life got in the way until recently. He has already penned eight novels and many short stories. His five latest novels, The Island, Pilgrimage of Grace, Desert Ark, Swordsmiths and Loyalty, are McStorytellers publications.
You can read Alasdair's full profile on McVoices.
He says he has always wanted to write, but life got in the way until recently. He has already penned eight novels and many short stories. His five latest novels, The Island, Pilgrimage of Grace, Desert Ark, Swordsmiths and Loyalty, are McStorytellers publications.
You can read Alasdair's full profile on McVoices.